My Favorite Date of the Year

Austin and I tend to eat out pretty often in this stage of life, and—this might surprise you—we're not big movie-goers. A lot of our date nights are pretty simple, with a dinner we'd enjoy, or a little time downtown. Since we both work downtown, too, there isn't always a huge difference between our "date" nights and our day-to-day. For an anniversary or special occasion, we may do something a little larger, but for the most part we're pretty predictable. We like sharing cubicles at J.O.B. or a cheese board at Scotch & Soda.

But, there is one day of the year that we make an exception to our basic date, and I look forward to it more than anything else. Since Austin and I have been married, we've started a New Year's Eve tradition of setting goals together and making a date out of it.

We'll call it the "let's do this" date, because we like writing our goals on this notepad in particular. Cherry Picker is another favorite of ours, and that's where we like going for this date. It's the best place in town to focus on contentment, cherishing the past, and considering what we want for the future. And I really can't explain why, but the vibe is there. We like taking it slow on this day with our tasty drinks and aspirations for the next year.

If you want to try your own "let's do this" date, here are some things we like to focus in on.

• We both write out individual goals on our own papers—we take some time to consider where we're interested in improving on our own first.
• Then, we trade papers and see what each other wrote. This is one of my favorite parts of our little tradition because it's a special way to connect, and I think it's extra important to share your goals with people who can root you on.
• Some of our goals are bigger, and some are small. For example, I wrote "bake a loaf of bread" on my list this year. That, theoretically, could just take a day, but it's something I know I want to do in 2020, so it went on the list.
• Finally, we sync up and write a list together. Some of the items are copied from one or both of our lists, but the focus here is that we both have individual goals, and then we have our goals as a couple.

The most important part of goal-setting is mindset. I try to never set goals from a place of negativity or beating myself up for things I haven't done yet. I love to think of a new year as full of potential, with endless possibility, especially as I go into it welcoming expansion. Wishing you all a 2020 full of both growth + peace. ❤️

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Creating New Christmas Traditions

Any newlyweds out there? Austin and I have been married for over a year now, but for the purpose of this post, I'm going to consider us newlyweds. Last year was our first married Christmas (which you can read about here), and it was so special. We embraced double the family time, double the traditions, and double the cheese platters (no complaints here)!

But at the same time, I'd be lying if I didn't say it lacked something of our own. You grow up a child with glittering expectations of Christmas morning — cinnamon rolls, stockings, snuggly blankets, and the house pet following your every move, hoping to get a crumb of said cinnamon roll. And then an adult, you realize each Christmas was so special because your family gave you that gift. The gift of holiday magic! The gift of traditions.

I think traditions can be really special, whether or not they hold a ton of deep meaning. Of course, there are religious traditions surrounding Christmas that I cherish and that become even more special over time. But I truly love the silly "just for fun" traditions too, like ugly sweater contests or cookie decorating parties.

I wrote on Thanksgiving about how my family has a longstanding custom of going to our friends' house to celebrate the holiday; we do it every year, and they have since they were in their 20's. I want to create that type of ritual that Austin and I can look forward to now, while we're in our 20's. Something we can grow with, look forward to, change with us — or maybe it'll simply be there as an anchor for the seasons in which we change. I don't want to wait until we have kids to make Christmas memorable.

So this one's for you if you're a millennial trying to wrangle holiday expectations with a new season of life. I'm with you; I see you. Of course, Christmas never changed. We might have.

This year, I'm going to talk with Austin about what tradition, silly or serious, we'd like to create for our family. Just us! Traditions aren't the glue that holds this season together, but I think they're icing on the sugar cookie.

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The Grace of Nostalgia

Above: An oldie but a goodie by Beth Solano. 

I've been thinking about nostalgia lately and some of its benefits. Namely, how it has this weird ability to infuse our memories with grace. Austin and I haven't even been married a year yet, but frolicking through this field for our "save the date" photos already feels like a lifetime ago. The reality of that day was me wearing the wrong shoes, fidgeting with my dress, and probably bickering with my sweet fiancé about something or other (hey, we're all human). Now, looking back, all I see are giggles. I'm beaming remembering the silly outtakes that can only come from having one of your best friends take your photo, and the unexpected blessing of having a second pair of shoes in my messy car. Grace. Love. Joy. The stuff that was there all along, if only camouflaged by bug bites and itchy ankles. Here's to enjoying the photos getting older and the memories getting good-er.

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Our First Married Christmas

Who knew a married Christmas would feel so different than a dating Christmas?! Besides the obvious fact that Austin and I live together now, somehow Christmas this year feels so different than the last. It's fun to think of new traditions to create together and prepare for the season, until... dun dun dunnnnn... you realize you're newlyweds and don't collectively own any holiday decor. Ha!

It had really never occurred to me that someday you have to buy your own Christmas stocking.. something we haven't done yet because I'm hoping the pretty Anthropologie ones will go on super sale. Thankfully, Austin and I were able to borrow some fun holiday decor from both of our moms — in addition to a few items we purchased — and our Christmas collection is off to a good start. I posted about it on my Instagram, but even though we have the big tree this year, my favorite is this tinsel tree with inoperable lights. I just love the look of the wiry silver branches.

For an affordable "centerpiece" solution, I dug around in the pile of extra branches at Lowe's, and we used some ornaments we didn't hang on the tree. It's fun to watch the sunlight reflect off of them in the morning; it lights up the whole living room!

Our little nutcracker friend is a nod to Austin's childhood collection. He's received a nutcracker from his grandma each year for Christmas since he was born — plus a few others from family and friends — and now he has over 30! I think it's 34, if I remember right.

To be honest, my favorite trees are made up of memories shared over the years. Special places, an ornament you picked up on this or that trip, and references to traits or interests that make our loved ones unique. But those are the trees you have to earn, over time, and I'm excited to collect all of those experiences together. A funky tree is just evidence of a full life. 

So, here we are. New last name, new traditions. Gingerbread house making, prime rib on Christmas Eve, Christmas Eve service at ET (my home church), stockings, egg nog, chicken cordon bleu on Christmas, and a nutcracker collection. Hey, I may be closer to that full, eclectic tree than I think. Merry Christmas, friends! I hope your holiday season is everything you wish it to be.

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